It's Wednesday-and I have a cold...*sniff*

Hey folks! I have some stuff weighing on me today, so I thought I would take this opportunity to unload a little. Last night, as I was hanging out with Coacharob and getting caught up on TiVO (LOST, ER and American Idol), enjoying some much needed unwinding time, and having fun just being a lazy bum, when the Ex LTR called me. Now, we had a talk earlier in the day that resulted in my crying and hanging up on him. At first I wasn't going to take this call, but I thought maybe he was going to apologize for his earlier hurtful behavior. I should have known better, after all we were together for 3 years and infatuated with one another for 15. He immediately launched into me, and got loud. There was nothing to say that had not been said a thousand times before so it wasn't as if he had some amazing new insight to share with me! Basically it boils down to this; There were some financial issues which are all my fault, He is glad I am gone, He never loved me anyway-I was just better than being alone, and I need to get my shit out of his house pronto! Now after spending three years of my life with this man I once admired and adored this is some painful shit to hear. But I held it together, didn't lose my cool, stood firm and hung up on him again. Then I fell apart and cried my little heart out. The coach was there for me, as she always is, to offer support and words of encouragement. I guess what sucks the most is that I really thought he and I could be friends, and now I have lost that as well. I went to check my IM and found that J. was waiting to talk. He explained to me that men like to make women feel bad because it is easier than saying, "Sorry." He and I talked for a bit and he managed to cheer me up, as he usually does. I went home, crashed out, and woke up feeling pretty good, until last night came back to me again. I just don't get why things have to be so complicated where the ex-LTR is concerned! I was ready to spend the rest of my life with him, and now we cannot stand one another. How does that happen so fast?! And why does it have to happen at all? I just don't understand it. Feedback, especially from my guys outh there would be nice, especially if you have an explaination.

On a different topic, thanks again to all of you who made VDay better with cards, or funny things to say. I needed that! And to my chat pal who has a loved one in surgery today...I Love Ya' and my thoughts are with you; if you need ANYTHING let me know.