It's Monday and I am feeling rather melancholy in addition to being sick. Fall always has the same effect on me. While I love the cooler weather, the changing leaves, and the smell of woodsmoke that hangs faintly in the air I cannot help but being a bit sad as well.
Fall is always that time when I tend to look back over the last several months and brood about things. Right now I am brooding over the turn my life has taken, and the fact that I am so completely dissatisfied with where I am.
I have always been an impulsive person by nature, and that does not always serve me well. In fact, the only good that I can say has come out of my choices the last few months is this relationship I have with my guy. He is wonderful, and amazing, and talented, and makes me extremely happy...Which is exactly why I refuse to label what he and I have, or to talk about it too much. But honestly, other than him there has not been a lot of positivity. I know that is due to MY choices, and the decisions I have made,or in some cases, refused to make...But all the same I just cannot seem to get my ass into high gear and get shit taken care of like I know I should.
The biggest issue right now is employment. I need a JOB...But I am also very serious about moving to Vegas so that limits the types of positions I can comfortably accept. The bigger problem is that those positions are the ones that PAY. While I can go flip burgers for a few months and feel productive I will not be making the kind of money I need- not to mention that my brain would likely atrophy in the process. So rather than make that move I just make NO move at all; which in turn compounds the problem. See what I mean?! I am a total mess here!
So, fellow bloggers, I need you all to fill my comment box with insight and advice in hopes that I might brigten up and get something accomplished here.
I promise to actually listen to you too...which should tell all of you how miserable I truly am right now. (LOL)
In the meantime try to have a Happy Monday,if such